Fans who have been keeping up with the Kardashians since the beginning know all about Khloé Kardashian's relationship with her now-ex-husband Lamar Odom. Although the two were adorable together for years, things quickly came crashing down after multiple infidelities and lies.
In Lamar's new memoir Darkness to Light, he discusses his regret with cheating on Khloé and ruining their relationship. "At the start of our marriage I was faithful to her," he writes, according to PEOPLE. However, as he developed a drug addiction, he was no longer a loyal husband.
"I could not handle the lethal cocktail of the spotlight, addiction, a diminishing career and infidelity," Lamar writes. "Oh, did I mention the paranoia, anxiety, depression. … I couldn’t keep my d**k in my pants or the coke out of my nose. Drug addicts are incredibly skilled at hiding their habit. I’d get defensive and Khloé would just drop it."
Unfortunately for Lamar, his addiction did not end until he suffered a near-fatal drug overdose and fell into a coma in 2015. Khloé was by his side during the whole ordeal and his recovery process, although she had already filed for divorce.
Lamar is now drug-free, and only has good things to say about his ex-wife. "I hope we can be friends," he tells PEOPLE. "I miss the family. And I hope we can all be reacquainted one day." We'll see if that wish ever comes to fruition.