15 Most Ridiculous Michael Scott Quotes

We know what you're thinking: how can we simply narrow it down to just 15? We don't know either, but we're going to try. If you watch The Office, you know how important Michael Scott is to it all. And after he left, things were never the same.


Here are 15 of the most bizarre, hilarious, and overall insane Michael Scott quotes.

15. "It's not about the horniness, it's about the loneliness."


14. "Would I rather be feared or loved? Easy. Both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me."

13. "The worst thing about prison was the Dementors. They were flying all over the place and they were scary and they'd come down and they'd suck the soul out of your body and it hurt!"

12. "I have cause. It is beCAUSE I hate him."

11. "I'm an early bird and I'm a night owl. So I'm wise and I have worms."

10. "I’m not superstitious, but I am a little stitious."

9. "It was on company property with company property, so double jeopardy. We are fine."

8. "Now, you may look around and see two groups here. White collar, blue collar. But I don’t see it that way. And you know why not? Because I am collar-blind."

7. "I need a username. And I have a great one. Little Kid Lover. That way people will know exactly where my priorities are at."

6. "I don't understand. We have a day honoring Martin Luther King, but he didn't even work here."

5. "It's not like booze ever killed anyone."

4. "Guess what? I have flaws. What are they? Oh I dunno, I sing in the shower? Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering. Occasionally I'll hit somebody with my car. So sue me."

3. "Am I going to tell them? No I'm not going to tell them. I don't see the point in that. As a doctor you would not tell a patient if they had cancer."

2. "It's a pimple, Phyllis. Avril Lavigne gets them all the time and she rocks harder than anyone alive."

1. "That is vodka and I mixed it with orange juice. I call it an oranvodjuice..ka."